Loving A Heartbreak

Having a broken heart is the worst feeling you can ever experience. You will feel tightness, heaviness and actual pain in your chest and stomach. As if someone tries to burn your heart. As if someone is pounding at your heart. May it be heartbreak from breaking up with your partner, feeling alone and lost, losing your friends and family members and the likes.

But I believe in loving a heartbreak, weird isn’t it? Why would people need to love it when they want to get over it? But that is the logic of it, you have to love it so you can get over it (unless you really don’t want to get over it and just ruin your self for someone who cannot stop damaging you).

How to do it? Below is my opinion on how to:

  1. Acceptance – you have to wake up and face the reality, accepting that your time with someone has already ended. I know that it’s hard to accept the fact that someone broke your heart, it’s hard to accept that what you had with someone is not special anymore, it’s hard to accept that you lost someone forever, but know what’s harder? To be trapped inside the world you created just to please someone who just doesn’t care. To be waiting for someone who doesn’t have any plans on returning. Feel the pain, it will help you to open your eyes and there, you will start to accept everything.
  2. Forgiveness – forgiving someone who isn’t sorry is the bravest thing you can do. It’s a hard step to do, but very lightest way to move on. Forgive yourself as well, just because the person broke your heart that doesn’t mean you haven’t done anything wrong. Assess yourself and forgive yourself. Forgive yourself but never doubt yourself, you are more than enough. Forgive yourself for being in that situation. Just like the old saying says “Forgive and forget”. Forgiving someone is not easy, it needs a right time. Don’t hurry things up, time will come and automatically you will give that to the person and to your self.
  3. Don’t regret – don’t regret or think you have wasted your time hanging out with someone who ended up breaking your heart. You enjoyed those times together, you smiled, you laughed and you loved every bits of that moment so why regret things? Instead of wasting your time and energy regretting about it, start to think about what you have learned and how it molded you to be a strong person than before. Always opt for number 1 and it will be easier.
  4. Let go – let it all go and move on. Easier said than done, but you have to let go. Don’t hold grudges to someone because you will end up hurting yourself. It’s fine to be mad at them because you have a reason and it’s normal but you have to let go. Don’t hold on and cling to someone who wants to walk away, let them go. Learn to value yourself.

It’s okay to be sad, it’s okay to be mad, it’s okay to be heartbroken but loving all of it will give you peace of mind and heart, and a realization in life.

Always remember, it’s okay not to be okay, it’s normal to feel pain.

Loving a heartbreak will teach you that everything takes time and effort. Loving a heartbreak will make you stronger. Loving a heartbreak will open a new door for you, a new path to walk with to a better future and better you.

I Appreciate You, Yes You!

I’ve been active in blogging for almost a year now, and it’s really amazing!

My very first blog was last 2015, when I came back here in UAE for a job. If you haven’t read “Where It All Begins” then you might get confused if you’ve read “Life As An Overseas Worker” first. But what’s more confusing is this statement hahaha! Anyway, I deleted my first blog because I’m not confident enough and doubting myself if what I’m doing is right and okay.

Fast forward to 2019, I started blogging, still not confident but I don’t doubt on myself anymore. I cannot please everyone, I cannot blog based on what people really expected in a blog but I’m trying. I blog because I want to motivate people, I want to share my experiences and maybe give some light to some people who are experiencing and experienced what I’ve been thru. I might blog something that’s too personal to blog or might post a topic that is really unattractive for some people. My vocabulary is limited.

But I really love blogging, I love conveying my feelings through blogs.

Especially the blogging and writing community. I’m really grateful and thankful for the community. I’ve talked and established a relationship with other bloggers from different countries. I haven’t personally meet anyone from the community yet, but I really care for those people. OMG why am I in tears? hahaha I’m just grateful for having friends like you guys, for treating me nice and for spending time to talk to me. The connection and not being easily judged. I’m overwhelmed from the support I’ve been receiving, from the friendship you are giving, from the trust and most especially for accepting me not just as Yourstrulie but as Liezl. You guys are the best! I cannot express in words how thankful I’am to be a part of this community. I love you guys and from the bottom of my heart:

Salamat


Gracias

Arigatogozaimasu

Kamsahamnida

Shukraan Gazilaan

Dhanyavaad

Grazie

Thank You!

Those are the languages I know in saying Thank you, I don’t want to google it and the list might be long enough we will take a couple of more hours just to read it hahaha!

I really do appreciate you guys.I will always have your back! I will always be here to support you. I will always walk the journey with you.

Yourstrulie now signing off…

Joooooooooke!! Will never happen ofcourse, loving the community and there’s no reason to sign off yet. 🙂

Have a blessed day guys and stay safe!

Life As An Overseas Worker

Are you currently working or still studying and considering of working somewhere, may it be in your own country or abroad? Still uncertain?

I’m currently working abroad for 5 ages now, in 4 different companies. Yep! that’s a lot of companies considering its only 5 years. I have mentioned it in “You Deserve It!” as to why I have to keep on shifting jobs. Regrets? Other than not seeing my dad for 2 years before he passed away, I have nothing to regret. Is it hard? Yes, it is really difficult! Especially now that the globe is experiencing war with COVID19, the feeling of yearning to be with your family just to guarantee their safety and to support them emotionally and physically. It’s hard to be apart from your family, I missed a lot of; birthdays, festivals, weddings, family gatherings, Christmas’, new years and so forth. It’s hard not to see them, hold them, kiss them, cry with them and laugh with them. How about video calling them? Yes it is the most accessible way to see them but, I’m working here in the Middle East, and in this country, a video call isn’t that easy to use. Messenger call, Whatsapp call, and Skype are all blocked, I have to try several apps and VPNs until I stumbled upon zoom, but my mom is not a techie, so even if it’s easy to use, it’s kinda difficult for her.

Some people here are really nice and kind, especially the locals, it’s their country yet other expats like me think they own the place by the way they act. I’m of Asian descent and I have been verbally discriminated and racially profiled. At first, it was really hurtful, but as time passes by, I just don’t let it get into my nerves, it’s not worthy of time. Even how hard you explain yourself to them, they will not listen. I actually pity those kinds of people, why? Because they are insecure, cannot move on and humiliating themselves to society. Hopefully one day, there will be no people who will judge you by the shade of your skin and by your ethnicity, let’s also include people who have disabilities.

Do I earn a lot? Hhhhmmm compared to what I’m making when I was still working in my country, yes. Because the exchange rate is high, so my wage is high as well– at least if it’s converted to peso. I’m living and renting a room in a villa with 2 people. Lucky me, the rent is not expensive and it’s near to my office. But most people are going for a bedspace as it is really affordable. Bedspace is renting either, the upper or the lower bed of the double-deck in a room with other 6 people. There’s also called partition, wherein you will rent a small space inside a room, having your privacy compared to bed spacer as landlords built a thin wooden wall to separate you from other tenants. If you are fortunate enough to have a high salary, then you can rent a flat.

Perks of working overseas? Excellent salary package, great insurance if you are in a good company, you get to travel oftentimes as it is more affordable and accessible, extensive connection- new friends and families, got the chance to engage with different nationalities and learn their cultures, let’s say it will develop your communication skills since English is the universal language and you don’t have any option but to use it to interact, a yearly plane ticket for my annual leave, big servings of food (in my country foods are expensive plus the servings are too small), and molding you to be a great independent person. If you are in western countries, then the chance of acquiring citizenship is plausible.

Life as an overseas worker is not as easy as it appears to be. Some people believe that working abroad makes us wealthy and it’s sad because some friends or relatives will ask you favor, and if you can’t give them what they asked for, you are a selfish person in their eyes and will compare you to other overseas workers. People have different types of work and a sense of responsibility which they don’t seem to understand. You need to adjust to their cultures, rules and abide their law. I have to be away from my family so I can support them and provide what they need. Give them what I want them to have. I have to work harder so I can reward myself for doing a great job. There are days I have to eat merely this type and kind of food so I can save more. Of course, there are also days that I will eat and pig out and go to an expensive beanery. I’m quite fortunate compared to other overseas workers who barely eat and sleep properly just to earn more and send money to their families. Am I happy? So-so, pleased that I can provide what my family needs and wants, I can somehow buy what I want. And just what I’ve been telling the whole time, sad and hard because I’m away from my family. Sacrificing is what overseas workers do all the time. Homesickness is a powerful enemy of us. The word says it all. Courage is our shield and Family is what motivates us.

Spotlighted! An Unexpected Interview Worth Treasuring For…

After a short hiatus regarding blog posts (“Untitled 2019” isn’t really a blog post, I don’t think so!), I’m back!

How would you guys feel if someone were to approach you and ask you to do an interview with them, which would then be posted on their website or written about on their blog site? Exciting isn’t it?!

I was mentioned in one of the Ovasinax team’s tweets, last October (in 2019); they expressed an interest in featuring me on their website, and so, I sent them a direct message to inquire about that tweet. They replied sooner than expected, explained to me about the interview invitation, and told me the reason why they were interested in interviewing me. It was a thrilling moment for me, and I was so touched by their words regarding my blog posts. I was out of words and was feeling strong emotions because someone had acknowledged my blog posts in a positive way. My blog posts define me as a person… that’s why when someone shows an interest in them, it makes me feel like I’m an important and special person, contented and simply overjoyed.

When I received the questions from the Ovasinax team regarding my interview, I was excited to answer them all… the questions didn’t only focus on my blogging, but also on my overall life/existence in this world. Many of their questions were so nostalgia-inducing… they brought me back to old times and memories that I had of times when I was trying my best to become a better version of myself (I’m still in the process of doing that, by the way!). There were also “rapid-fire” questions that made me feel hyped up while answering them… I imagined answering them in person (face-to-face) while having fun but being pressured by time (and thinking that I needed to talk very fast… haha!). Please take a peek at the SPOTLIGHT tab on the official Ovasinax website, and you will get to know more about me there – regarding both my blogging life and my everyday life.

Later, my interview Q&A was posted on the official Ovasinax website and it went live! I still can’t stop reading through that page… I read it while smiling to myself. I just can’t believe that I’m featured on someone else’s website, not to mention having my own special section on it! I was initially kinda shy about mentioning this interview to my friends and family, but on second thoughts – why wouldn’t I?! So, I told them about it and shared the link on my Social Media accounts, and I’m both proud and thankful for the feature. It’s still surreal that someone did this for me… for “Yourstrulie”! We (the Ovasinax team and I) didn’t know each other to begin with… total strangers who are thousand miles apart… yet, my blog posts and my feelings reached them.

Curious about Ovasinax? It is a game that was created/designed based on memories of the creators’ youthful times, especially focusing on thoughts of young adult pool-parties… Ovasinax is a tandem sprint race that features a man running or walking as fast as he can in a swimming pool while a woman stands and sits on his shoulders (this is during competition with two other male-female pairs), and this game also serves to promote – competition, fitness motivation, and expressions of bright personalities (when possible).

The Ovasinax game and website were designed by Jerome and Lucy who, by the way, have been happily married for 12 years now, are in their 40s, and are still kicking the sports that they both love; they are Canadians of Asian origin (Sri Lankan and Filipino heritage, respectively). Jerome and Lucy both work in the medical field… we all know how tight the schedules of people who work in this field can be, but these two still manage to enjoy traveling; they also appreciate cold weather – which is just perfect for a cuddle – and are very fond of animals, especially cats. Their hobbies include reading and writing, which explains why they pay attention to blogs and blog posts.

The Ovasinax team is constantly promoting and supporting me, which is a very big help in terms of expanding my network and helping my blog posts to become known by people around the globe; they also don’t ask for anything from me in return. Still, I decided to do an interview, and this time, it will be with them in the spotlight. They actually didn’t want to do it, but I insisted and told them that it’s my way of showing my gratitude to them. So, without further ado….

Question: How did you come across my blog posts?
Answer: We came across your blog site and your blog posts after we came across your tweets and your whole Twitter account; since you are clearly very engaging and popular on Twitter, we then checked out your blog posts and were very impressed by your openness, sweetness, purpose, and heart (all of which you display whenever you write/compose).

Question: When did you make the decision to feature me on the official Ovasinax website? Why?
Answer: We decided to ask you if you would like to be interviewed by us (and be featured on a special page on the official Ovasinax website), very soon after we read your magnetic blog posts.
The reasons for wanting to feature you on the official Ovasinax website were – you seemed to have a great personality, you are certainly an up-and-coming blogger, you (we felt sure) would be honest & detailed in your interview answers, and you are very beautiful.

Question: Out of all of my blog posts, which most caught your attention or interest? Why?
Answer: All of your blog posts are interesting, and the two that captivated us the most were – “The Warmth Of Armenia” and “Love, Future You!”.
The reasons for those two posts being especially interesting were – the first one was a great travel-based post with gorgeous pictures and nice anecdotes, while the second one had important and inspiring pieces of general life advice.

Question: How and where did Ovasinax get started?
Answer: Ovasinax got started in our minds, based on thoughts of younger “party” days… the concept was expanded upon (and the rules & regulations were created) by us in Canada, although since Canada is a relatively cold country, Ovasinax has unsurprisingly gained most interest in warmer parts of the world (like Australia).

Question: What is your main goal regarding Ovasinax and how do you think it will help people who play it?
Answer: Our main goal regarding Ovasinax is for it to keep on growing and gaining popularity in more parts of the world (hopefully, it can eventually get onto TV screens worldwide, too!). Ovasinax is a great way for couples to train together, bond with each other, motivate/challenge each other, and stay fit together… plus – it is romantic!

Question: How do you describe the best feeling you have had, regarding Ovasinax?
Answer: The best feeling that we have had (re: Ovasinax), so far is – pride while seeing more and more people in different countries becoming interested in this game and trying to play it, write about it, film videos about it, and tell other people about it.

The Ovasinax team consists of such good-hearted people; their pieces of advice and their suggestions motivate me to do better. From strangers to friends! From “someone” to mentors! Glad that they came across my blog posts, and glad to have them in every chapter of Yourstrulie’s journey!

You can check them out in:

Untitled 2019

Your eyes are blue,

Which is my favorite hue

Your lips are pinkish,

That I really would like to kiss

Your smile is so sweet,

My heart is melting just by looking at it

You are a man with a big heart,

And you are such a perfect art

I care for you the most,

Surely when you leave I’ll be lost

I adore you greatly,

And I’m sure I will be loving you solely

My Loved Ones Are Merry On Christmas

Christmas is the time of the year where families gather around to celebrate, catch up, exchange gifts and have fun, not to mention the unlimited laughter and food. Unfortunately I’m not with them—5 years in a row!

Living in a different country makes it more difficult to make my family happy especially when video calls are blocked. With the help of my cousin who is also living here but in a different state, I decided to surprise them and give them small gifts.

My cousin went home to the Philippines to celebrate Christmas with her family and my gifts are with her. Fast forward on Christmas eve. I was really nervous and kept on asking my cousins and relatives if they started the party already. Then my brother sent me a greeting message. I was typing my reply when he sent me another one saying thank you. I got excited and called them, my brother was literally in a high pitched tone and kept on saying thank you as he was really not expecting it, he even asked me where did I get my money from hahaha! Then I heard my mom crying and saying Thanks as well, she was worried and kept on telling me to buy things and think of myself as well.

Here’s the video of my surprise to them ( It’s in my language tho, I know some of you won’t understand it but you can clearly see their reactions, and just a note, my brother’s foot was kinda swollen and injured from playing volleyball )

My brother was really annoyed when he opened the first gift tho and he just told that I’m such an insult lol! They didn’t think that I will be having a gift for them on Christmas as my uncle already handed them “what they thought are the only things I bought for them”.

I can’t stop watching it ’til now. My heart melts seeing their smiles and reaction. I may be far and not with them but their happiness is more than enough for me to keep going and fight the battle of life.

I know my dad is proud of me and I know, he is guiding me that’s why my life is much easier than before. I just wish I can see him smile, hug him so tight, kiss him on the cheek and greet him one last time. I just wish to be with you dad!

Christmas is all about giving but for me everyday is Christmas day as we should give and put a smile on a person’s face. May it be close to you or a total stranger. It’s also not about what and how expensive things we should give to them. It’s the thought that counts is what they always say! Their happiness and smiles will surely be engraved in our hearts forever. A simple act can really touch a person’s heart.

It may be late but I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas and Happy New Year in advance!

Care to share your most successful surprise?

Why I Survived The Problems and Challenges of Life

Hardships are part of our lives, whether we like it or not. It might make you strong or might make you want to give up. It depends on how we take those hardships and how we deal with it. I myself encountered so many hardships and still experiencing them. There are times where I really just want to give up but the list below are the thing’s I’ve done to endure everything for the sake of my family and especially for the sake of myself.

  1. Think Twice Before You Act, Before You Speak. Learn how to weigh the situation before you take an action. Always think of the consequences, will it be good for you or will it further damage you? Thinking before opening your mouth wouldn’t hurt, instead it will teach you to be witty and patient.
  2. Shrugged It Off. When you are about to give up the last straw that you are holding after all the things you’ve been through, well stop right there! You’ve endured a lot already why give up now? You suffered already why not continue it?I mean, you should fight on your suffering or just shrugged it off and tell to yourself “One more time buddy, let’s show who really the boss is!” In my language “Todo na ‘to!”, meaning push yourself further.
  3. Stick To Your Goals. Just because you are not achieving your goals yet you will create a new set of goals. No. Believe me it will only hurt you. Stick to your goals, even if there’s so many trials and the roads are rough, if you set your mind on achieving it you will achieve it. And once you achieved your set of goals, you can make another one if you want.
  4. One At A Time. Multi-tasking is good, it will help you finish on time and train you to work with minimal supervision with accurate outcome. BUT don’t multi-task on handling your problems and dealing with the hardships you are currently going through. Solving life problems is similar to solving math problems. You need to solve the first one before you move to the next one until you finish it all. Solving problems all at the same time will give you sleepless nights and endless headaches. Solve one problem but do not forget the others. Be cautious and always let yourself breathe.
  5. Don’t Pity Yourself. Stop making yourself more depressed and stressed, what you are going through are enough, don’t add and stir drama. Pitying yourself will only make the situation worst, you won’t be able to move forward and it will be too late to go back. So self pity will just leave you hanging in the air, lost and demotivated. Stand strong and don’t let yourself down, Always think you are still fortunate compared to other people who are suffering worst than you are but still managing to fight the battle and never loses hope.
  6. Love Of Families And Friends. Never be embarrassed of what is happening to you, don’t keep it by yourself. Talk to your families and friends, even if they can’t help you financially, they can help you emotionally. Money cannot buy the sincerity and care by the people who truly love you. Sure money is important but their love, support, effort, understanding and words can keep you calm and stay strong and motivated. A hug from them is more than enough to fight.
  7. Believe In Yourself. Just what like Sailor Venus says “Just believe in yourself and nobody can’t beat you!”, Your self is your own enemy. So just keep on moving forward and help yourself go through those hardships. Even if no one believes in you, you need to believe in your self and prove them wrong. Believing what you are capable of is the best way to achieve your goals and endure any hardships that will come to you.
  8. Talk To Him. Submit everything to HIM. HE knows what your heart truly desires. No matter where you are and what you are doing, you can always talk to HIM and ask for peace of mind, heart and guidance.

I talked about giving up is sometimes a good thing in my previous post, but that situation is different, so in life and in this post I will say that you should not give up. Problems and hardships are included in our life already from the very first day when we were born. You just have to play the game well and not be eaten by negative aura and demons. Always look at the brighter side. And remember, after battling with those hardships, good things will start to come.

There’s a rainbow always after the rain. Always keep that in mind and in your heart.

(Potential) Signs Of Being Abused In A Relationship

Have you ever been in a toxic and abusive relationship with someone? Have you tried fixing it or you are just inlove with the idea of being in a relationship and ignored the signs and red flags?

Couples at the beginning are full of love and joy, smile and laughters are endless. Those dates and late hang outs makes your heart flutter. Those hugs and kisses are too hard to end–until you came to know each other too well.

I have been in a toxic relationship before and thankfully not abusive but I can tell that you will not realize it’s toxic unless you are totally out of that relationship. Signs that you are in a toxic relationship (abused POV):

  1. It’s always your fault no matter what he/she did to you (talking about physically and mentally, let’s add emotionally), it’s always your fault. You always feel at fault all the time.
  2. You are mad at him/her when he/she cheated on you or do something bad but fall for him/her even harder when he/she “explained” to you and denied everything.
  3. You put him/her first before anyone else. Before anything else, even if it means loosing your dreams and goals especially your life and career.
  4. You don’t respect yourself anymore and just beg for his/her forgiveness, beg for him/her to not go (top of the list!)
  5. You know the truth but still choose to be blinded by your love ( or is it really love?)
  6. You will seek advice and comfort from your friends but won’t listen and choose to stay with him/her even you know for yourself it’s not healthy anymore. Even if it means losing your friends and family.

How to get away with it? Well it’s not easy, some people are abusive either, emotionally or physically. It’s even harder if it’s both. It may be easy to say this and I know it is hard:

  1. But always trust your guts, don’t wait until it’s too late.
  2. ALWAYS LOVE YOURSELF FIRST.
  3. It’s okay to be afraid, it’s fine if you are afraid of him/her but always remember you have friends and family you can run in to.
  4. It’s hard but you have to help yourself, you have to step up for yourself and for your future.
  5. Don’t be denial and delusional. It’s hard to do this but you have to give it a try. Think of your happy times before you met him/her. You are happy even before he/she came to your life so you could do it also even when he/she isn’t there anymore.
  6. Go out and have some fun, breathe some air and laugh (don’t laugh alone please lol). Don’t sulk in and don’t let depression eat you.
  7. Always remember you are loved by many.

It’s really hard to get out of a toxic and unhealthy relationship, you just have to stay strong for your dreams and future with your family and friends. Be vocal, even if you can see your friends and family getting irritated and annoyed when you open your mouth to talk about him/her, it’s fine. They are not mad at you, they are concerned to the point of saying hurtful words to you just so you wake up from the nightmare you allowed to dream of. It’s okay to give up, sometimes giving up is not a sign of being a coward, sometimes it’s a sign of being strong because you are getting your self out from the situation that may drag you down. Especially when you are fighting to save your relationship yet he/she isn’t.

Giving up your life? Getting tired of it? Nahhh– run to your friends and family, they will give you a lot of reason to move forward.

We are here for you.

I’AM HERE FOR YOU.

I’m Not Okay But It’s Okay

I was walking yesterday to clear up my mind, thinking whether what I’m doing is right or wrong. I have lots of issues I’m struggling to fight with right now. I always seem to complain in everything. Like EVERYTHING! I’m too sensitive and always end up being emotionally stressed out and dramatic. I tend to be grumpy most of the time nowadays. Even in text messages, a person can clearly know that I’m irritated or not in a good mood.

Then I decided to do these things to get out of the spot I created:

  1. I decided to go for a walk so I won’t allow my self to further hit the red button (becoming depressed).
  2. Indulge myself by buying me a booba and a piece of cake. (Cheat day it is!)
  3. Enjoy the breeze of the cold and gentle wind that touches my skin.
  4. Gaze up and appreciate the beauty of the sky.
  5. Oh and did I mentioned walk with your friend?Yes! Big help to have someone accompany you. Having someone beside you helps a lot. Most especially if your friend talks non-stop. Like you are having your own issues yet you are listening to other people’s issues.

Those are just simple and basics but surely you will automatically feel at peace, relaxed and start to become positive again. It helped me cleared up my mind and thought that maybe I’m like that because I was inside the house most of the time.

I realized we are just like the sky above us. Life is not all about joy and laughter it’s not always morning. Gloomy days, evening time will come and it’s okay, we are not perfect, we are humans who have emotions and feelings but always remember that it’s your choice whether to stay on that spot or not. It will not even cost you that much if you want to fight that issues and throw it in a bin. You don’t need a fancy tour, all you need is a courage to step out, appreciate life and continue building the better version of you.

You Deserve It!

Life consists of ups and downs, it won’t give you a pure bliss..it won’t give you just laughter..and it won’t definitely give you a straight path to walk to.

When I first entered the outside world (career world) I thought it will be easy, I thought I will be on the top—-no.

I joined an airline company and oh boy! it was really really a tough job. Talking to an irate passenger, talking to a non-English speaking passenger, profiling the passenger if they can travel (infants, sick person, pregnant woman). Always be cautious not to fret the passengers when there’s a prison inmate that will board the plane with them. Explain to passengers why flights are delayed and cancelled all over again right after announcing it and so on. But mind you, working in an airline company doesn’t give you the privilege to earn a lot of money (idk with other airline tho) except for the cabin crews and captains ofcourse (ground crew here! lol). But it does give you the privilege to be commended by the passengers you helped with and by the management who appreciate your hardwork in the field. The privilege to feel contented and happy seeing your passengers smiling and appreciating you. I love my job even if I had a few hours of sleep and most of the time staying at the airport to work even in my days off but I have to step down, take it slow and consider what my family requested. So I resigned and joined the local municipality of our town, still in line with Tourism which I studied in college.

After a year, I decided to go abroad and apply for work (which I partly regretted it– you can take a look on my first blog “My first love left me” ). On my 2nd week, I found a job but the owner keeps on hitting on me and harassing me by trying to touch my private parts so I left the job. I didn’t file a complain to the police ‘coz I don’t have a working visa that time so I tried looking for another job but got unlucky until 2 months later someone hired me, it’s a restaurant and it’s my first time to work in F&B and with that, I really work so hard until the HR who also happens to be my fellow country men told me that they cannot process my visa yet but they will provide whatever I need (another tourist visa). My initial plan was to take the salary I worked for a month and half then resign but again I got unlucky, my visa has expired, so I need to exit and buy another visa. They told me they will give my salary when I came back which never happened. I gave them 2 weeks to give me my salary and reimburse my visa expenses but I didn’t receive anything so I just left the restaurant and felt really down and stupid at that moment, I’m so broke in a city where my family is far from me. I have relatives who helped me but ofcourse I cannot ask their full support since they have their own family to support as well. But heaven is still good to me after I left, the restaurant closed because there’s only few diner left and the government issued them letter to close because of hygiene issues.

After 3 months, I got hired again and I’m lucky because they gave me working visa or so I thought. People are good there, my director is good but how he ran the company is not that great. People started taking advantage of him until our salaries got delayed, almost 2 months. My increment which they promised never took place, I wasn’t able to save that much and after working with him for 2 years, I didn’t renew my visa.

Then unexpected things happened, the year after quitting my job was the worst year of my life (see again “My First Love Left Me” ) I was hired by this laboratory, after my interview I got a call and offer the same day. I started working with them, everything seems to be okay they waited for me when I have to go home for my father’s funeral. Going back, I got offloaded 2 times (immigration was so hard on me huhubels) on my 3rd time, they finally stamped my passport. So I got back and started working but things started to be kinda off, but I just shrugged it off and not bother. But that was a mistake, salaries are always delayed and on installment basis, I signed for a secretarial post but later on became the Receptionist, Accountant (which I don’t have any background nor studied and work experience), HR and Collection Officer plus I have to call and set an appointment for my manager and doctors while doing all those tasks. I have 2 phones in front of me, only 1 computer and I still have to take care of the technicians who cannot work properly without my guidance to think I don’t know how to do what they are doing! (I’m getting hyped up just remembering it). I asked them if they can hire even one person who can help me because before I joined this lab there’s 4 people who are doing it. But they just told me learn to manage my time, yeah right! I’m calling for a collection while doing invoices while following up the cases to be delivered from the technicians while following up to the drivers the pick up request from clinics while answering the calls from the clinics and suppliers and while calling for applicants who are applying for technician, oh and not to mention going out to buy office supplies and picking up the boss’ son from school! My working hours is from 8:30am to 7:00pm sometimes until 10:00pm without overtime pay and I still have to work while eating my lunch. (ranting too much?haha sorry about that). I’m the one to be blamed if the case haven’t arrive to the doctors outside the country yet even if I’m following it up to the customs, I’m the one to be blamed if there’s no tissue and alcohol, and also when the bidet inside the washroom is not working, could you believe that?! Then I have had enough! I resigned, not because of the workload but because of the delayed salary and the management ( I know it’s not reasonable but what can I do? I need to support my mom who is having a therapy, my brother still doesn’t have a job that time, my father just died, I need to pay their bills and my bills here abroad, my house rent, my food and theirs, my fare everyday to go to work). Imagine not having a single penny during Christmas and New Year because they hold your salary while other employees already got theirs. I filed a complain in labour and luckily I’ve won.

I got so depressed of what’s happening to my life that time. Thinking that I should have died instead of my father, I’m not a better person, I’m not a good daughter and sister, I’m at this age and yet I’m still broke I still didn’t accomplish anything from what I planned and dreamed of. Thinking what have I done to go through all of this. It’s like I’m laughing but crying inside, I’m breathing but dead inside.

I was so so near in giving up until I received an email. One company invited me for a job interview and so I gave it a try. I got hired after 2 weeks of being a bum! I told to myself ‘if this won’t work out I’ll just go home’.

Everyone is telling me that my Director is a good man, indeed he is really a good and wonderful man and his family. My brother had to go to the hospital and so I asked if I can have a salary advance, without saying anything he opened his wallet and gave me the amount I was asking for. We have a big event to organize and since we finished setting it up early, he invited me over to their place, I told him I will just stay there but he doesn’t want me to be left alone. His exact words are, “I will not leave you alone here, I will not let you eat by yourself. Let’s go to my place, my wife cooked food. Let’s eat, take a rest and then come back.” So we go to his place, I played with his sooo cutie patootie son and ate the food which her wife cooked (it was so delicious that I decided to break my diet that time haha). My director knows how to run his company well. He is not micro managing us and he is giving our salary on time, so on time that I will get it sometimes on 23rd of the month! My colleagues are nice as well. I’m only a month old that time in my company yet he allowed me to take 2 weeks leave and go home to commemorate my father’s first death anniversary. This blog won’t be enough to tell how a great man he is and how grateful and blessed I’am to have him as my boss and to work in this company. I just hope the business will further boom and will be a conglomerate because he is the type of person who deserve it and will still be stepping on the ground, helping those who are in need.

It took me years to find the right person to work with and the job worth working for, not that my previous jobs were not worth it but compared to my current one I’ll say it really is worth all the hardships I faced before. After experiencing everything I’ve been and gone through, I can finally feel that I’m a deserving person. I deserve what I have and will have in the future.

People who are suffering from pain, feeling of being neglected, sadness and hardships tend to think they are weak and useless because they are in that kind of situation. WE are in that kind of situation. But NO! Those who are feeling those kind of things and in that situation are the strongest ones. Everything happens for a reason, so if you are in such situation right now. Don’t worry, your patience, determination and hard work will be paid off. Happiness will come into your way just like what happened to me. So stand up and use your experience to become the person you want to be. You’ll soon find it because You Deserve It! and who knows maybe it will happen to you right this moment.